


Say Goodnight, Not Goodbye

by dsa_archivist



Category: due South
Genre: Drama, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 1999-02-20
Updated: 1999-02-20
Packaged: 2018-11-10 06:25:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,205
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11121702
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dsa_archivist/pseuds/dsa_archivist
Summary: True friendship overcomes all obstacles, even death.  A conversation between the living and the dead.





	Say Goodnight, Not Goodbye

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Speranza, the archivist: this story was once archived at [Due South Archive](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Due_South_Archive). To preserve the archive, I began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in June 2017. I tried to reach out to all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [Due South Archive collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/duesoutharchive).

Say Goodnight, Not Goodbye

 

 

Say Goodnight, Not Goodbye
    
    
    Disclaimer:  Benton, Ray, Stan, and everybody else belong to Alliance
    Communications.  I don't own them- never claimed to either.  I'm not
    making any money over this, so don't even try to sue me.  You'd have
    to go through my dad to get any thing and he's a right son-of-a-bitch.
    Trust me.  You're better off without the cash.
    
    Rating: PG- kinda sad...just a warning...
    
    Author's Notes:  This is the first thing that I ever posted anywhere.
    I like it.  Doesn't mean you will.  Everything's relative.  I was in
    a mood and it just came to me.  It's rather sad but there's potential
    there for positivity and cheesey amounts of hope.  Nothing near Susan
    Proto, however. Again, it's all about the in-joke, my friends.  Thank
    you's are in order.  Thanks to Kim for telling me that although she didn't
    like the premise, that it could be a great story.  And for calling me
    a cow.  Thanks to Tamani, Jess, Mom, and everyone who responded to me
    from the DSL list. You've given me the self-confidence to write more.
    God help us all. 
    
    Last note, I momprise: I take all feed back and flames keep me warm-
    the only thing I don't accept is American Express.  So, tell me what
    you think at.  Thank you kindly.
    

* * *
    
    
    **********************
    Say goodnight, not good-bye
    You will never leave my heart behind
    Like the path of a star
    I'll be anywhere you are
    
    In the spark that lies beneath the coals
    In the secret place inside your soul
    Keep my light in your eyes
    Say goodnight, not goodbye
    **********************
    
              "It's not his fault."
    
              "I know...I know that, Benny.  It's just that I...I can't...I
    don't know."  Ray sighed and lowered his head , resting it on the window.
    His green eyes closed and he sighed again.
    
              "It's not your fault either."  Ray spun around to face his
    friend, suddenly enraged.
    
              "How can you say that?!  How can you SAY that, huh?!"  Ray
    advanced on Fraser, waving his arms, all the emotions that he had been
    working so hard to push down for so long exploding to the surface.  "How
    is it not my fault, Fraser?  You tell me because I've been trying to
    figure this whole thing out for days now and I have yet to figure out
    has this can be anything BUT my fault."  He stood in front of Benny,
    breathing hard through his nose, glaring at his friend.
    
              "Ray...There was nothing you could have done to prevent what
    happened.  Absolutely nothing."  Fraser raised his hand to keep Ray from
    interrupting.  "And to be perfectly honest Ray, if you would have been
    there, you might have ended up dead yourself.  And I wouldn't have been
    able to live with that."  He continued to look Ray in the eye for a few
    more seconds but let his gaze drop to his booted feet.  He began to speak
    again, never raising his eyes.  "You're the best friend I have ever had.
    If anything were to happen to you..."
    
              "Oh, Benny..."  Ray laughed, although without much mirth. 
    "You think that what did happen is any easier to live with?  I mean,
    you..."  He was interrupted by a knock at the door.  "Yeah?"
    
              "Yeah, Ray?  It's me, Ra...I mean, Stan.  You're, uh, mother
    is askin' for ya.  Uh, Franny won't come out of her room and we need
    to get to the airport and, uh, she needs your help, so, uh..."  
    
              "Be right there.  I'm, uh, on the phone right now.  Tell Ma
    I'll be right there."  Ray turned to look at his friend.  "Look, Benny,
    right now nothing you can say or do will convince me that I couldn't
    have changed things.  If I would have stayed in Chicago, if I wouldn't
    have left, this might not have happened."
    
              "Ray, I think you're wrong."  Fraser moved away from the wall
    and towards his friend.  "If this was meant to be, it would have happened
    sooner or later, no  matter what you did or did not do.  And I, for one,
    cannot allow you to wallow in guilt and self loathing.  You can't place
    blame for this Ray.  You just can't.  All you can do is accept that what
    happened is over and done with and that you have to move on with your
    life."   Ray smiled and turned away, picking up his coat from the bed.
    He picked his travel bag up off the floor and headed for the door.  He
    paused before he reached it and turned back 
    around.
    
              "Is it cold up there right now?  In Canada, I mean." Fraser
    mirrored his smile.
              "Do you want the long answer or the short one?"  
    
              "Ah, Benny, what I wouldn't give to hear you go on and on about
    Canadian weather systems for hours but..."  The smile was gone from his
    face and his eyes shone as tears threatened to spill.  He looked down
    at his shoes, then back at his friend.  "We have to get to the airport
    so that we don't miss your..."  He choked on the word and paused before
    beginning again.  "Your funeral.  It's funny, ya know.  Those idiots
    in charge of the Mounties want nothin' to do with you for years and now
    that you're a hero in the States, all they want is to bring you back."
    Ray had nothing left to say and he 
    couldn't bring himself to say good-bye.  That would be too painful, too
    hard.  And he didn't think that he was strong enough to do it.  So with
    nothing else to add, he reached for the door handle to leave, when Benny
    spoke.
    
              "I'll keep in touch Ray."  He paused, not knowing what to do
    or say.  What kind of response did you give a ghost anyway?  "You understand
    that I will keep in touch.." He continued. Ray almost broke down right
    then and there, but held his composure.  Not turning around, he filled
    in the next line.
              "As a friend?"
    
              "Yeah Ray.  As a friend."  And then there was nothing.  The
    presence that had been in the room with him for the past hour or so was
    gone, leaving only an empty space behind it.  The deep sadness that had
    been fighting to overtake him earlier in the day was 
    threatening to return but Ray fought it back.  Fraser always kept his
    word.  Ray would hear from his friend again.  And it was that rock solid
    faith in the mountie that made him turn around one more time before he
    left the room.
              "Goodnight Benny.  I'll be seein' ya."
    
    ********************           
    Don't you fear when you dream
    Waking up is never what it seems
    Like a jewel buried deep
    Like a promise meant to keep
    
    You are everything you want to be
    So just let your heart reach out to me
    I'll be right by your side
    Say goodnight not good-bye
    
    You are everything you want to be
    So just let your heart reach out to me
    Keep my light in your eyes
    Say goodnight, not good-bye
    **********************
    
    

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